It’s well documented that I am not the biggest fan of women’s soccer.  However, I’m still getting pretty stoked for USA-Germany tonight.  Earlier this week, I was talking to a buddy from Germany who told me I should actually start getting more interested in this tournament…

Some may ask why I’d be friends with anybody who could make such misogynistic jokes, but they need to remember that we are proponents of cultural tolerance on this site.  Germans have a different way of humor, but they are still happy, they tend to be pretty chill people overall, and they are responsible for giving us Dirk and Jürgen Klinsmann.  So let’s just laugh and let live…

Another reason I’m getting pumped for this match is some of the analysis I’ve seen in the media lately.  Check out Julie Foudy on ESPN FC Sunday night…

Oh my god could you believe that smiley face?  That was just absolutely the most adorable thing I have ever seen in sports!**

Just. So. Cute!!  And how about Dan Thomas spitting that fire game?  Nice work bro.

In all seriousness though, there are legitimate reasons that this game might, maybe be cool.  Possibly…  In the women’s game, you tend to see the players having a lot more space to work with and the possession is much more clearly defined and controlled (similar to Olympic hockey).  It can be a nice change of pace from a men’s game where the players can seem rushed too often.  Is this unique style worth getting geeked up to watch a plethora of group games?  Fuck no.  Is it worth watching a few big games once every four years.  Sure!

There is also a lot of American pride at stake, and that’s legit.  It really is fun and uplifting for your country to win this tournament.  Japan’s 2011 victory meant a lot to their country as they were still coping from a horrific tsunami.  I know the Germans take a lot of pride in the two straight titles they won in the early 2000s.

Our own title in 1999 was awesome.  It cannot be understated how important that win was in helping bust through all of the inertia impeding the growth of US soccer culture as a whole for so many decades.  Hosting the 94 Men’s tournament was a huge catalyst in legitimizing this sport, but it was just as important to see a group of our own people beat the rest of the world to realize the sport of soccer was the truth.  As frustrating as it can be to watch our men’s team battle through the long, arduous path it takes to rise from irrelevance to being a true world force, it always helps to see our women kick ass to know that maybe our boys could pull it off one day as well.

The title game itself was a great sports moment as well.  Super intense throughout the entire overtime.  Brianna Scurry game up big for us in goal.  Kristine Lilly had a monster play for us in overtime to header out a ball on the goal line (can’t find a video but you’ll see it on TV soon if we win tonight).  And then PKs where our women were clutch city.  Also, the ten year old boys like me who were growing up in an era of pre-internet porn will never forget the treasure that Brandi Chastain gave us…

To wrap, can we all agree that this might be the greatest Nike commercial ever?  (Warning: not suitable for the 2015 PC police, but if you made it this far you’re probably down to laugh and let live)

Oh yeah and take us with the spread on a pick em line at +104.  Don’t fuck with the three way line.

**Danica Patrick’s foot stomp in 2006 goes to #2