Marte the Marlin Has Arrived!

By my calculations, it took exactly one night for new Marlins OF Starling Marte to notch himself a full WAR. What a deadline prize. Now it’s the fish doing the hauling instead of being hauled. Marte has a $12M option for next year that the Marlins are buying too. No more being cheap. We cleaned…

This COVID Remake of a Famous WW2 Song Is So Sick

If you like sports, chances are you like history. Because history is war, and sports are simulated war. That’s one of several reasons there’s a new song out that’s just really moving me man. This is some art… It’s a covid remake of a famous WW2 song from the UK in 1939 about going away…

Stars Screw the Pooch, Again. We’re in Trouble

The Stars fucked up big time on Friday night in a game where everything was set up our way. We had a back to back coming off a night where we physically beat the shit out of the Flames to the point where Tkachuk couldn’t play. We also had a rested goalie on top of…

Champions League Gambling Lock: Bayern vs Barca

Both of the games so far have been awesome even though my picks have sucked. That will partially continue today – this matchup is the best of the entire tournament and will probably decide the champion, while the theory of third time’s a charm means I’m probably due for a win. I’ll be dead honest…

Can Tkachump the Coward Ice Up Enough to Play Tonight?

The first order of business last night was putting that coward Matthew Tkachump in the training room, and our captain got to work as soon as a face-off opportunity presented itself. This is how you spear a bitch… Tkachump left the game, but came back hobbled and had his head hunted for the rest of…

Rafael Montero Is the Coolest Closer in the League

Are the Rangers any good? No. Are they in playoff position regardless? You bet your ass they are! One of the reasons for that is our new shut down closer Rafael Montero. He got his first save a week ago and has been 4/4 since. Four innings, four strikeouts, four saves, and ZERO baserunners allowed.…

Champions League Gambling Lock: Atletico vs RB Leipzig

Atletico Madrid vs RB Leipzig in the quarterfinals today. I’m obviously going Spaniards after writing yesterday that Atletico +850 was a future to get on. They always goes far in this tournament and were one PK away from beating peak Madrid for a title. They’re made for tournaments like this and they’ve already proven that…