Rangers Can Salvage the Season With a Clutch Loss to Arizona Tonight

In the month that has passed since getting ritually massacred by Slam Diego and their four straight grand slams, the Rangers season has gone from doomed to straight up catastrophic.

They ended that Padres series at 10-14 and proceeded to trash up the joint over the ensuing weeks for a 3-13 record. Somehow, that losing streak was so great that the Rangers finished Labor Day within the grasp of the greatest beacon of hope this franchise has ever seen.

Standing at 13-27, the Rangers were a half game ahead (behind?) the Pittsburgh Pirates for dead last in the MLB and the rights to draft this guy…

Holy shit. Fuck winning. We’re still rebuilding anyway. We can make a run for this blindian sensation and get one of the most badass prospects I’ve ever seen!

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Not so fast, says Lance Lynn as he immediately spearheads a series win vs Angels and a split with the freakin 1st place Athletics.

What the hell, man? We had nothing to gain by winning and everything to lose! Why, whhyyyy did we have to start winning all of a sudden?

The worst part – we could have easily traded Lynn for a haul at the deadline. If it weren’t for Shane Bieber, he’d be in the drivers seat of a Cy Young race. He’s an ASSET and then some for prospective playoff teams.

1.93 ERA and .92 WHIP going into the deadline. A 4-1 record with our garbage ass offense. This is a bonified ace starting pitcher for chrissakes! What is he doing on our team still??

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Jon Daniels said the offers weren’t good enough, but that’s hard to believe and his seat has grown hotter than it’s ever been. This is a tough pill to swallow.

Anybody’s who’s read my baseblogs before will know that I’m a huge Jon Daniels apologist and that isn’t changing any time soon. I find it impossible to believe he’s as stupid as he’s seemed to look this year.

A more likely theory is that our sketchy-as-hell ownership group found themselves in a serious bind by building a new stadium (albeit after scamming the hell out of Arlington) and opening it in a fan-less pandemic season. On top of oil markets crashing all year, the owners are kind of fucked and need to sell tickets next year. They wouldn’t sign off on a tear-down.

It’s a much more sound theory than the idea that our god GM, who’s been among the smartest men in baseball for 15 years, would be so mind-numbingly over his head at the trade deadline.

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Fortunately, there’s still hope for 2020. We won’t be able to finish last place, but it looked like that was out of reach from the start because the Pirates are just so god damn awful that out-losing them was impossible. But we do have a shot at second to last…

And there’s another pitcher from Vandy that’s apparently almost as good as Kumar – Jack Leiter. Oh shit, that’s awesome!

We entered a two game series at Arizona last night, and the Rangers struck first with a clutch as hell blowout loss. D-bags over Rangers in a 7-0 drubbing. Love it.

If we lose tonight, we have a 3.5 game cushion over those fuckers with just four games vs houston remaining. The battle for Leiter would be all but won.

Come on Rangers – LOSE!!

We’re starting some shitty 27 year old rookie named Wes Benjamin.

D-bags -151. Lock it up.