First, Seattle stole away Pete Carroll to build a badass NFL team.  (It helps that the NFL is much lighter on cheating than the NCAA).  Then, that same team crushed the collective souls of the Bay Area and sent the Niners to the cellar of the league.  Now, as we saw last night, Seattle may have pulled off an even greater coup in the college ranks.

SI’s Pete Thamel put together an excellent scorch job this morning to show just how badly USC has been fucking up…

Chris Petersen, then at Boise State, interviewed for the USC job following the 2013 season. The USC brass dismissed Petersen as not dynamic enough and too unwilling to handle the media and booster obligations that go hand-in-hand with the biggest football job in Los Angeles.

So USC athletic director Pat Haden went back to the Win Forever well, hiring Steve Sarkisian from Washington as a replacement for his old co-offensive coordinator, Lane Kiffin.

But perhaps more tellingly, USC hired a familiar face from USC’s Never Never Land—a time that USC officials remember more for the wins and attention than the cheating and NCAA sanctions that followed. After a program defining loss filled with bad penalties and questionable game management, it’s clear that USC’s decision to hire Sarkisian​ has left the Trojans stuck in the past, like Uncle Rico chasing state.

[…]

When considering Sarkisian versus Petersen, USC picked hoodies over khakis, sideline volatility over serenity and a coach who has proven he can win on signing day as opposed to league play. USC took Sarkisian with his 35–29 record at Washington over Petersen’s 92–12 at Boise. USC took style over substance, sizzle over steak. They took the comfort of Uncle Pete’s coaching tree over the proven acumen of Coach Pete. While those records are not apples to apples comparisons, we’ve learned at USC that there’s something to be said for having received a driver’s license before taking over a Cadillac program. And, no, winning the Holiday Bowl doesn’t count.

Yeah, wonderful work USC…  Lane Kiffin turned out to be a disaster, so let’s go right the ship with his former co-offensive coordinator.  His team at Washington sucks, but he used to coach for Pete Carroll so of course he’ll just magically become better when he gets to Los Angeles…

Meanwhile, Seattle gets to dump ‘Seven Win Sark’ for one of the best coaches of this entire era.  The same coach that wanted to be at USC, but didn’t have a dynamic enough media personality to handle ‘the biggest football program in Los Angeles’.  Ahhh poor Chris Peterson…  If only he was more willing to get plastered before speaking at booster events, he could’ve been qualified to coach in LA instead of having to slum it up in Seattle.

BTW – called it!