Apocalypse Now – Flopping in NFL Football

The Cowboys offense was certainly not in Death Star mode throughout most of the night, but we can still be encouraged by what happened in crunch time. In the last two minutes of both halves, Dak and his boys made some spectacular plays.

The first half ended with us getting the ball back at 1:56 remaining and scoring with ease on a surgical ten play drive. Dak was 5/5 for 47 yards and also had 12 on the ground with this badass pretty-much-TD run.

Our two minute drill didn’t have quite the same rhythm in the second half, but there was one moment that was so sensational it could’ve made up for everything that possibly went wrong all game.

What a throw. What a catch. And what a pussy ass flop by Jalen Ramsey.

What in the world has our country come to? Flopping. In mother fucking football… By a defender no less! Disgusting.

Take note all you young DBs out there… Want a $100M contract? Add flopping to your arsenal like Jalen Ramsey did.

Everyone assumes that soccer is the sport for flopping, but that’s not actually true anymore. They started penalizing players for it, and now with VAR it’s basically impossible. Brazil screwed themselves in the World Cup because of it. It’s out of the game now.

Ironically, they did it for us. They did it to get more Americans watching. Yet somehow, the plague of flopping still has life, and that life is flourishing in what was once the great country of America.


Obviously, basketball is to blame here. After all, athletes these days come from a generation that was led to worship a 6’9” 250lb icon that loved to flop. Harden too etc. Thanks a lot NBA fans.

It also would’ve helped to have pass interference reviewable by replay. We finally managed to get that… Yes there was a rough start, but after those October owners meetings it was working.

We could’ve just stopped whining then and had this thing we’d spent decades begging for. But noooo we can’t have nice things.

Congratulations America. You now have flopping in your football. Hope everyone is proud of themselves.


PS – technically none of the games are in America these days, but there’s a badass hockey team from Texas that knows how to take care of flopping

Apocalypse Now – Flopping in NFL Football

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